Nightmare at 9D

 

 

 

Darcey Lindsey          

My feet felt like heavy bricks being dragged along the narrow aisle, holding me back from my seat at 9D. Wondering eyes glanced up at me, and I pondered what they could be thinking. Did they notice the sweat beading my forehead or upper lip? Or the way my knuckles turned pale the tighter I grasped the straps of my backpack? Perhaps, the fear emanating inside me was finally beginning to seep.

I was met with the overwhelming aroma of perfume and cologne, a mixture that didn’t sit well with my nose. It stung my nostrils and for such a confined space, it was an annoyance. But I’d have to endure it for the hour-long trip to Denver. My eyes scanned the seat numbers until coming across row 9 and I readily took my seat by the window. I upgraded my ticket specifically to choose my own seat, so I chose the one closest to the window and nearest to the emergency exits. To me, this felt like the one thing I was in control of. Everything else was out of my hands. Soon I’d be hovering hundreds of feet up in the air with nothing but the tacky, carpeted floor and layers of steel beneath my feet. 

My toes curled into themselves like they were grasping for leverage or life. I couldn’t tell the difference in that moment. The area around me was cramped and my legs barely had room to stretch. The windows were minute, not at all like what I’d seen in movies. Condensation from the morning rain trickled down the glass. You could smell the dampness in the air and it was alluring, the scent of rain always being a favorite of mine.

As more people began filing into the plane, I buckled myself into the seat making sure to fill any gap between the belt and my waist. The squeeze was harsh and uncomfortable but I was safe. My eyes avoided each person that passed by row 9 silently pleading that no one would sit next to me. In such a small plane, it would be congested and I wasn’t fond of others invading my personal space. My nerves and anxiety were already about to overflow, it didn’t need to get any worse. 

Those pleas were denied as a middle-aged woman with shoulder length mousy brown hair and dark circular framed glasses stored her carry-on bag in the bins above and planted herself next to me, giving a soft smile in my direction. I questioned whether I should’ve stored my minuscule backpack up there too instead of hidden beneath my seat. My first flight was already turning into a mess. A shaky hand swiped at the sweat above my upper lip, a salty droplet trailing down into my mouth. I blotted the rest of my face with the sleeve of my purple silk button up shirt and hoped the lady next to me wouldn’t be able to smell the sweat.

We sat there in silence and my eyes were drawn to the window next to me, where golden rays from the morning sunrise reached out. The warmth was welcoming like a friend. I peered out the window, squinting from the brightness and was embraced by a wondrous sight. Pinks, oranges, yellows, and reds all blended into one, creating a painting before my eyes. Oh, how wonderful it was to witness one of the beauties the natural world had to offer. My thoughts were intruded upon when the voice of the flight attendant sounded throughout the plane. Welcoming everyone aboard the flight and running through your usual safety protocols, she stated we would be taking off shortly. Her words became muffled and my heart beat in its place, thumping like a drum. Could the woman next to me hear it too? Panic set in and I did the only thing that could bring me temporary relief. I bit down on my nails, my teeth chipping away like a scraper on flaking paint. The chewing continued even after a metallic taste filled my mouth.

“Are you nervous?” The woman inquired, startling me out of my own mind. Was it that obvious? Embarrassment washed over me and I cowered slowly into my seat. I paused my nail biting only to reply to the curious lady.

 “Y-yeah, it’s my first flight.” I managed to mutter the words despite finding it very difficult to speak at all. Why was I opening up to a complete stranger? It was unlike me but she seemed genuine and almost concerned.

What came out of her mouth next baffled me and threw me for a loop. “If at all during this flight you get scared or nervous, feel free to hold my hand. I don’t mind.” I’m sure I looked quite stupid then, gawking at her like some other worldly being. I was so transfixed that any other thought escaped my mind completely. How soothing it was to hear such kind words from a total stranger. I could only nod with a grin forming on my face before reverting to look out my window.

My heart beat louder and louder as the plane revved its engine, backing out of the terminal and making its journey to the runway. We sat there a moment, and I wondered what they were waiting for. The engine pierced my ears as the plane sped forward at an impossible speed. My body was forced back against the seat, suddenly a prisoner to gravity. It was exhilarating and exciting and I smiled from ear to ear from the fuzzy feeling it caused in my stomach. When we became airborne, I felt so light. It was as if all 260 pounds of me disintegrated with the increasing altitude. The wheels were pulled up under the plane causing it to jolt slightly and I was sure I had stopped breathing momentarily. The town below me that I called home grew smaller. The roads and cars resembled ants trekking down dirt paths and if I reached out a finger, it was as if I could squish them. The innocence in me tried seeking out my mother’s house where my son would be sound asleep, cozy in his bed. I hoped I’d see him again.

The flight attendant came around offering complimentary cookies and drinks for our short flight. I graciously accepted the cookies and a cup of water. Crumbly cinnamon goodness filled my mouth and was washed down with a splash of water. I hadn’t realized just how thirsty I was. My cracked lips parted, creating rows of broken crevices on the once soft skin. My mouth was a scorched desert, lapping at every drop of water as it cascaded down my throat. Another temporary relief I desperately needed then.

That relief was washed away when our plane abruptly started rocking and shaking and a noise chimed above me, signaling turbulence. I breathed with heavy, shallow breaths and tried not to think of how this might be my impending doom. This wasn’t how I wanted to go. The fear arising in me cast a black veil over my mind. Whatever positive thoughts I had left entwined themselves with the stitching in the veil. Tears threatened to spill over like an overflowing cup. My stomach twisted and turned along with the tilt of the plane’s wings. 

With no hesitation, I slid my hand into the hand of the lady beside me and she squeezed knowingly. Her hands felt slightly wrinkled, like the pages of an aging book. Nonetheless, they were pleasant and toasty. I quietly prayed that she wouldn’t mind my sweaty, clammy palm. My eyes clamped shut. It felt like a lifetime had passed before the unnerving shaking stopped.

Still, I held the strangers’ hand and took the opportunity to look to the sky, where we swam amongst the clouds. They looked like cotton balls matted together to form a blanket of fluffiness over the earth. The sky was a lighter blue than I had ever imagined it to be. I had lived my whole life only seeing earth and life from one angle, never having known how beautiful it looks from up high. 

It wasn’t until Denver came into my line of sight that I released her hand, casting a thankful smile toward her. I breathed a sigh of relief when the pilot announced we would be landing soon. Planes could be seen coming to and from the Denver Airport. I stared in awe, wondering about the places they could be going and where a ticket could take me next. There were worldwide wonders that needed to be seen; the big, small, and the obscure. A matter of hours and a wad of cash could take someone across border lines or the entire world, and maybe the most exciting part of it for me is that one day I might be the comforting hand for a nervous passenger, too.